Am I still deciding, or am I just looking for permission?
An honest read on whether your mind is still open, and what would actually change it.
- When to use
- When you keep researching, asking around and making lists, and nothing moves.
- Time
- 10 min
- In the pack
- The big decision Step 1 of 7
The prompt
For a while now I’ve been going back and forth on . I want to know whether I’m still deciding, or have already decided and am looking for permission. Don’t answer yet. Ask me up to six questions, one at a time, about what I’ve avoided looking into, whose opinion I’ve asked for, how I react when someone disagrees, and what I’d do if I had to choose today. Then tell me which it is: still open, decided and wanting permission, or decided and afraid. Show the evidence from my answers. Name one thing that would genuinely change my mind and how I could find it out, or tell me that nothing I mentioned would. Don’t flatter me, and mark what you’re inferring. Be direct. No padding and no reassurance I did not ask for.
You’ve heard me go back and forth on . From what you know about me and what I’ve said, am I still deciding, or have I already decided and want permission? Tell me which way I’m leaning, show the evidence from our conversations, separate what you know from what you infer, and name one thing that would genuinely change my mind. Don’t flatter me. Be direct. No padding and no reassurance I did not ask for.
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More like this.
Close to this one, by scene and by moment.
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Decide 10 min On paper it’s a yes. So why does my gut say no?
A name for what your gut is reacting to, and whether it’s information or just nerves.
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Decide 5 min I keep going back and forth. What does this choice come down to?
The one trade-off underneath a two-way choice, in a sentence you can say out loud.
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Decide 5 min Both options feel wrong. What’s the third one?
Your either-or decision restated as a wider question, plus four options you hadn’t put on the table.