What am I really buying when I buy this?

I’m thinking about buying for about . Before you give any opinion, ask me up to five questions, one at a time, about what I expect it to change, what I use now, and what this money would otherwise do. Then tell me in a few sentences what I’m really buying: the result or feeling underneath the object. Give me three ways to get that same result, from the cheapest up to this purchase, and a simple test I could run in the next two weeks to find out whether I’d actually use it. Don’t talk me into it or out of it. If my answers don’t settle it, say what’s still missing.