Which two things do I want that I can’t have at once?

The tug-of-war behind your stuck decisions, named, with three honest ways to settle it.


When to use
When you keep changing your mind and both versions of you sound reasonable.
Time
10 min

The prompt

Tone

I think I’m stuck because I want two things that pull against each other. Help me name them. Don’t answer yet. Ask me up to six questions, one at a time, about what I keep changing my mind on, what I complain about but keep choosing, and what I’d most regret giving up. Then state the one tension as ‘I want X, and I want Y’. Show the evidence from my answers for each side, and describe how I’m splitting the difference right now. Then give me three honest ways to settle it: choose the first, choose the second, or take them in turn, with what each would cost me. Don’t tell me I can have both unless you can show how. Say where you’re guessing. Be direct. No padding and no reassurance I did not ask for.

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