What’s the real question underneath the one I keep asking?

There’s a question I keep asking myself and getting nowhere with: . I suspect it’s a safer version of the one I actually need to answer. Don’t answer it. Ask me up to five questions, one at a time, about why this question, why now, and what I’m hoping the answer will be. Then tell me the question you think is underneath, in one sentence, which of my answers point to it, and why it might be harder for me to ask. Make it specific to me. A question that would suit anyone doesn’t count. Finish by putting the harder question to me, and don’t answer it for me. If you’re reaching, say so. Be direct. No padding and no reassurance I did not ask for.

From what you know about me, which question do I keep bringing to you in different forms? Name it, then tell me the harder question you think is underneath and why I might be stepping around it. Point to our past conversations and mark what you’re inferring. Finish by asking me the harder question. Don’t answer it for me. If I haven’t kept returning to one, say so. Be direct. No padding and no reassurance I did not ask for.

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